Final Big Ten Football Power Rankings

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1) No. 5 Wisconsin (11-1, 7-1 Big Ten); Last week, 1

Last week: won vs. Northwestern 70-23
Apparently there’s some big game being played in Southern California on New Year’s Day. Something to do with roses? Anyway, in our final 2010 edition of Big Ten Power Rankings, let’s dish on the all-conference teams a little bit. I liked John Moffitt and Gabe Carimi both getting first-team nods on the line, and obviously J.J. Watt was going to be there too. But Scott Tolzien deserved a better fate than coaches’ 2nd-team and media honorable mention. Tolzien and Northwestern’s Dan Persa had stupidly similar numbers - 74 percent completions (outrageous), a heavily-slanted TD-to-INT ratio, and plenty of passing yards. Didn’t look like the fact that Tolzien beat 11 teams and Persa beat seven (with a combined record of 30-53) meant anything.

2) No. 6 Ohio State (11-1, 7-1); LW, 2
Last week: won vs. Michigan 37-7
Five Buckeye defenders on the coaches’ first team is not overkill at all. What a fierce unit once again crafted by Jim Tressel and his staff - OSU allowed more than 20 points just ONCE all season long. A rematch of Wisconsin’s offense vs. Ohio State’s defense would be fun, hypothetically. However, Pryor got stiffed with his relegation to honorable mention. He makes the Buckeyes tick offensively - he’s every bit of a force as Cam Newton without two things, the flash and the cash. (As far as we know.)

3) No. 8 Michigan State (11-1, 7-1); LW, 3
Last week: won at Penn State 28-22
An impressive, we-too-belong win at Penn State probably won’t be enough to push the poor Spartans into the BCS. But Mark Dantonio - a well-deserving honoree for the Dave McClain award - ordered up some sour grapes by campaigning his team should be higher than Wisconsin just because MSU beat them (not in a tight win, but not in a rout) a few months ago. It’s a body of work, bud. Don’t lose to an Iowa team that was clearly fraudulent. Still, the two-teams-per-league rule will shut out Sparty the same way it did Bucky in 2006. Seriously, BCS, enjoy 7-5 Pittsburgh (if a few things fall into place).

4) Penn State (7-5, 4-4); LW, 5
Last week: lost vs. No. 10 Michigan State 28-22
Anybody want this fourth spot? Anybody at all? The Outback Bowl doesn’t have a lot of great choices once the big three go Rose, BCS at-large and Capital One Bowl. PSU, as my boss Don Doxsie put it, finished the season doing the least amount of damage to itself. Not to portray too much love for Wisconsin and Ohio State, but one wonders how Evan Royster’s 4.9 yards a carry and six touchdowns warranted a second-team coaches spot over the 7.0 yards a lug and 14 TDs for the Big Ten Frosh of the Year, James White. Is being a senior that important?

5) Illinois (6-5, 4-4); LW, 7
Last week: Idle
Well, the trip to Cali should be fun to finish the year. Illinois could really use the win, not just for an impressive resume-builder against 7-4 Fresno State, but also to pull even with the other 18 teams in this conference that finished 7-5 overall and .500 in conference. Mikel LeShoure has already wrapped up the rushing title, and is working on three straight 100-yard games. Another one and he’ll probably get to 1,500 before the bowl.
Next: at Fresno State, Fri. 9:15 p.m. ESPN2

6) Iowa (7-5, 4-4); LW, 4
Last week: lost at Minnesota 27-24
You just have to wonder if a guy like Adrian Clayborn is glad he came back. Well, he’s healthy and a deserving first-team defensive end who should be drafted highly next April. Rick Stanzi’s a heck of a leader and talented quarterback, but it’s hard to complain with both the coaches and media not even giving him honorable mention because he simply didn’t finish games this season. The murmurs about firing Kirk Ferentz are preposterous, solely built on quick-hit emotion after a bad loss in Minneapolis. Breathe, Hawkeye fans. It’ll be fine. Remember those Oranges from 11 months ago.

7) Michigan (7-5, 3-5); LW, 6
Last week: lost at No. 8 Ohio State 37-7
Sooooo ... Denard Robinson is an honorable mention quarterback, but the coaches gave him Offensive Player of the Year. While feeling the need to make Persa a first-teamer. Good to know those coaches are spending about 7 or 8 minutes on their ballots. Between this and the Royster thing, why make the coaches vote on a team if they’re not going to do it right?

8) Purdue (4-8, 2-6); LW, 8
Last week: lost vs. Indiana 34-31 (OT)
Hey, remember when the Boilermakers were 2-0 in conference? Neither does anyone else. Six straight losses to end the year, and Purdue allowed 34-plus points in five of them (at least 27 in every one). When you have the Big Ten consensus defensive player of the year, Ryan Kerrigan, on your side, that shows how far Purdue needs to grow as a defense.

9) Northwestern (7-5, 3-5); LW, 9
Last week: lost at No. 7 Wisconsin 70-23
Okay, so Dan Persa might be more important to his football team than any other player in the Big Ten Conference. We saw that in the way Northwestern collapsed in the final two weeks (though a missing quarterback has little to do with allowing 118 points in two games). But coaches and media aren’t supposed to vote based on value. It’s a vote based on merit. Tolzien, Pryor, Robinson, and arguably Kirk Cousins and Ricky Stanzi were better for their teams from start to finish than Persa. First-team all-conference is a gift.

10) Minnesota (3-9, 2-6); LW, 10
Last week: won vs. No. 24 Iowa 27-24
Pig out, Gopher fans. Amazing how even Minnesota was able to take advantage of Iowa’s lack of desire for a final win. Two of the three non-bowl-eligible Big Ten teams finished with wins, something that any sports fan can appreciate.

11) Indiana (5-7, 1-7); LW, 11
Last week: won at Purdue 34-31 (OT)
I just can’t lift Indiana out of last place, even with the extra-period win at rival Purdue. Obviously, the fact that IU scraped together five wins wasn’t enough to save Bill Lynch’s job. He’s a good man who was put in a tough situation after Terry Hoeppner’s death, but how long can you really give an interim coach to turn things around? Looks like the Hoosiers are stuck in building mode for at least a couple more years.

Week 12 Big Ten Power Rankings

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1) No. 7* Wisconsin (9-1, 5-1 Big Ten); Last week, 1
*BCS rankings used
Last week: won vs. Indiana 83-20
For years as a Badgers beat writer, I heard Wisconsin coach Bret Bielema offer an interesting take on his team: “we’re not the prettiest girl in school, but we’ve always got a date to the prom.” Meaning, UW consistently finds itself ranked highly and playing in esteemed bowl games, even if the Badgers don’t dominate the SportsCenter highlights with unbelievable play. The 2010 Badgers must have gotten one of those quick-fix makeovers. Hanging 70 on Austin Peay? EIGHTY-THREE POINTS against Indiana??? Don’t forget former Gophers coach Tim Brewster’s accusing Bielema of running it up. How different these Badgers are. If they end up smelling Roses, it’ll all be worth it.
Next: at Michigan, 11 a.m. ESPN

2) No. 9 Ohio State (9-1, 5-1); LW, 2
Last week: won vs. Penn State 38-14
Like Wisconsin, the end result was a rout. But like Wisconsin, it didn’t start out that way. The Buckeyes came out of the locker room down 14-3 for the second half before turning things around. OSU has to be careful going into an always-hostile Kinnick Stadium to play a team that may or may not be, for lack of better words, ticked off.
Next: at No. 20 Iowa, 2:30 p.m. ABC

3) No. 12 Michigan State (9-1, 5-1); LW, 3
Last week: Idle
Not a bad way to spend a bye week. Iowa’s loss probably meant the most to Michigan State, since that was the only conference contender who had been defeated by Iowa. Now if the Spartans - whose end-of-season schedule is easier than Wisconsin’s and OSU’s - can hang on, they just need either the Badgers or Buckeyes to lose once to be all but certain of a BCS bid.
Next: vs. Purdue, 11 a.m. BTN

4) No. 20 Iowa (7-3, 4-2); LW, 4
Last week: lost at Northwestern 21-17
Ricky Stanzi, you cannot make that throw to the end zone with a 10-point lead like that. Stanzi’s career has been marked with good, intelligent decisions, but that gave Northwestern full momentum to make the comeback. Things are pretty gloomy in the Heartland - the OSU game has lost much of its luster, at least to the locals. Who knows its effect in the Hawkeyes’ locker room.
Next: vs. No. 9 Ohio State, 2:30 p.m. ABC

5) Northwestern (7-3, 3-3); LW, 8
Last week: won vs. No. 13 Iowa 21-17
And we have yet another entrant to the “Fans Who Inexplicably Rush The Field After A Win” contest that apparently America’s college students have decided to stage this season. Iowa’s good, sure, but, uh, both teams now have identical records. And it was at Northwestern. And Iowa wasn’t even in the top ten. And the Wildcats have now beaten Iowa five out of six. Come on, NU kids. It’s not like a semi-attractive girl showed her face at the 50-yard-line.
Next: vs. Illinois, 2:30 p.m. ESPNU

6) Michigan (7-3, 3-3); LW, 7
Last week: won at Purdue 27-16
It has to be said: 19-0. That was the halftime score two seasons ago, in favor of Wisconsin, before the Wolverines stormed back for a shocking 27-25 win. UW has won just twice at Michigan Stadium in 48 years, and its current drought goes back to 1994. James White was 2 years old. Needless to say, the Badgers have some demons to exorcise on Saturday.
Next: vs. No. 7 Wisconsin, 11 a.m. ESPN

7) Penn State (6-4, 3-3); LW, 5
Last week: lost at No. 9 Ohio State 38-14
Matt McGloin has a promising future in white - and one heck of a name to go with it - but he can’t make mistakes like the one he made getting picked by Devon Torrence to let the Buckeyes take control. It’s odd to see a Penn State team with talent that’s still considered a total rebuilding project, but that’s what we’ve got.
Next: at Indiana, 11 a.m. BTN

8) Illinois (5-5, 3-4); LW, 6
Last week: lost vs. Minnesota 38-34
Let’s go ahead and call this a startling turn of events in Champaign, no? The monster win in Happy Valley was so close to igniting a 4-2 record in Big Ten play before the Illini scored 65 points in a loss ... followed by this. Losing to one of the worst teams in a BCS conference on Senior Day. Now it’s off to Evanston and Fresno to try and scratch out a win just for the right to play in a 13th game, if it means that much to the Illini.
Next: at Northwestern, 2:30 p.m. ESPNU

9) Purdue (4-6, 2-4); LW, 9
Last week: lost vs. Michigan 27-16
Well, at least the Boilermakers lost by just 11 this week. That’s a squeaker compared to Purdue’s last month. Its last shot at playing spoiler comes in East Lansing, not to mention any prayer of a bowl game shot.
Next: at No. 12 Michigan State, 11 a.m. BTN

10) Minnesota (2-9, 1-6); LW, 11
Last week: won at Illinois 38-34
Hey, perfect timing! Get the big win, and enjoy a week off! All is right in Gopherland again. You know, except those 63 problems that have dogged this football team all season long. Screw it, it’s bye week time!
Next: Idle

11) Indiana (4-6, 0-6); LW, 10
Last week: lost at No. 7 Wisconsin 83-20
Rock bottom. That’s what this feels like. Minnesota probably doesn’t deserve to be relieved of its guard duties in the cellar, but Minnesota hasn’t relinquished 83 points in an afternoon before. Any and all progress gained from narrow losses to Northwestern and Iowa have been wiped away. At least Indiana didn’t accuse of Wisconsin of running it up - it’s competitive football. If the Hoosiers had a problem with it, they probably should have done something about it between the lines.
Next: vs. Penn State, 11 a.m. BTN

Petek projects this January's BCS bowlers

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We're halfway to bowl season, and it's time for Justin "Check, Please" Petek, resident Cheesehead, to gaze into his crystal ball and tell us who will be playing in which BCS bowl. Have at it, JP.

National Championship Game: Oregon Ducks vs. Texas Christian Horned Frogs

Oregon looks like a steamroller in the west. Hide your kids, hide your wife, cuz they’re beating everyone out there. The Ducks don’t have an easy path with road games at USC and bitter rival Oregon State, but they could win at Chuck Norris U. the way they are playing.

I project TCU to finish undefeated and use a high-quality road win at Utah to surpass undefeated Boise State and 1-loss Alabama to make the title game. This could come down to the thousandths place.

Rose Bowl: Wisconsin Badgers vs. Boise State Broncos

Wisconsin will land in the Rose Bowl as Big Ten champions via the head-to-head tiebreaker with Ohio State, who could also land here if Michigan State finishes 11-1.

After deep contemplation, the Rose Bowl will select Boise State with its at-large bid. They will not be obligated to the Broncos, since automatic-qualifier TCU is in the title game. An all-Big Ten Rose Bowl with Ohio State will tempt them, as will 1-loss Auburn, but Boise State’s undefeated record, high ranking, western location, and capable fan base will prevail.

Sugar Bowl: Alabama Crimson Tide vs. Ohio State Buckeyes

Alabama will valiantly climb the rankings and challenge for a national championship game spot, but ultimately fall short and head to New Orleans as 1-loss SEC champion after defeating Auburn and then Florida in the SEC Championship.

Ohio State will finish strong with one loss and get the at-large nod from the Sugar Bowl and another crack at a strong SEC opponent. Michigan State or Wisconsin could also land here if Ohio State wins a 3-way tie.

Fiesta Bowl: Oklahoma Sooners vs. Pittsburgh Panthers

Oklahoma will represent the Big 12 in the Fiesta Bowl after a hard-fought win over Nebraska in the conference title game.

Pittsburgh will land in Arizona as Big East champion, followed by a trail of profanities from the likes of Missouri, Utah, and Stanford, sparking a debate about the merit of automatic qualifier by conference.

Orange Bowl: Florida State Seminoles vs. Auburn Tigers

Florida State will be headed down to Miami as ACC champions.

Auburn will carry their #1 ranking all the way to Tuscaloosa, where they will fall, but remain a very attractive at-large selection for the Orange Bowl.

Week 8 Big Ten Power Rankings

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WEEK 8 BIG TEN POWER RANKINGS
Aaron Brenner, BadgerNation.com alum

1) No. 8 Michigan State (7-0, 3-0 Big Ten); LW, 3
Last week: won vs. Illinois 26-6
Let’s just get this out there up front. I have absolutely no idea how to rank these top four. I sat here for a solid 15 minutes trying to figure it out. Do you go with prior results? How these teams look right now? How I project them to end up in the future? It’s the most difficult week of rankings I’ve had since I started doing these, for both football and basketball. I guess at the top, we’ll stick with the only undefeated team who has now beaten an on-the-map Wisconsin and a better-than-you-think Illinois. But pay heed to the fact that Sparty has not left the state of Michigan yet. Wins at Iowa and Penn State are far from a certainty.
Next: at Northwestern, Sat. 11 a.m. ESPN

2a) No. 11 Ohio State (6-1, 2-1); last week’s ranking, 1
Last week: lost at No. 18 Wisconsin 31-18
I came away very impressed with Terrelle Pryor, especially considering that, yes, his return to Camp Randall was not one of his best games. He’s an incredible scrambler, a guy that just makes plays on third down. Obviously, the vaunted Buckeye defense and special teams units have to be concerned with their effort in defeat. But on the rushing D front, OSU doesn’t have to see John Clay and James White again.
Next: vs. Purdue, Sat. 11 a.m. BTN

2b) No. 13 Iowa (5-1, 2-0); LW, 2
Last week: won at Michigan 38-28
Kept hearing on Sunday about how if MSU, OSU and Wisconsin run the table, the Badgers will get shut out of the BCS by the 2-team-per-conference rule. Ummmm ... we didn’t forget about the highly-ranked team that will host those three foes in October and November now, did we?
Next: vs. No. 10 Wisconsin, Sat. 2:30 p.m. ABC

2c) No. 10 Wisconsin (6-1, 2-1); LW, 4
Last week: won vs. No. 1 Ohio State 31-18
I’m sure that placing Wisconsin right where it was last week - below MSU, OSU and Iowa - will upset some readers. And that’s fair. Just know that the 2c notation is legitimate. The Badgers are tied for second with the Bucks and Hawks. At gunpoint, though, if I have to pick between those three, I’m just not completely sold on Wisconsin’s passing game and ability to get off the field on third downs. Wisconsin won that game Saturday on pure emotion, feeding off a frenzied crowd. Camp Randall will have nothing to do with what Wisconsin does for an encore in four days.
Next: at No. 13 Iowa, Sat. 2:30 p.m. ABC

5) Illinois (3-3, 1-2); LW, 6
Last week: lost at No. 13 Michigan State 26-6
Obviously, there is a Gabe Carimi-sized gap between the top four and the bottom seven in this conference. But if we’re evaluating the second tier, it’s worth pointing out the Fighting Illini don’t face another ranked opponent the rest of the way. An 8-4 finish is entirely possible for the Zooker.
Next: vs. Illinois, Sat. 11 a.m. BTN

6) Michigan (5-2, 1-2); LW, 5
Last week: lost vs. No. 15 Iowa 38-28
If there’s a Big Ten game the rest of the way I can’t wait to see (not including showdowns between any of the top four), it’s on the weekend preceding Thanksgiving, when Bret Bielema takes his boys to Ann Arbor. The Wolverines have been handing out wins like Baby Ruths on Halloween to conference opponents in Michigan Stadium, which has been a Big House of Horrors to Wisconsin.
Next: Idle

7) Penn State (3-3, 0-2); LW, 7
Last week: Idle
Since the rest of the conference is irrelevant, and there were no important games over the weekend, we’ll keep the rankings as is. For the optimists looking for possible threats to MSU’s perfect season - particularly if the Spartans escape Kinnick alive in two weeks - look no further than the season finale, when MSU has to deal with Happy Valley, never an easy place to win.
Next: at Minnesota, Sat. 11 a.m. ESPNU

8) Purdue (4-2, 2-0); LW, 8
Last week: won vs. Minnesota 28-17
Hey, don’t sleep on undefeated Purdue as Big Ten championship contenders! (Yeah, right.) If you’re keeping score at home, it was the Boilermakers who sent Tim Brewster on his merry way. It was a nice, balanced effort for Purdue’s offense, racking up just south of 400 yards.
Next: at No. 11 Ohio State, Sat. 11 a.m. BTN

9) Northwestern (5-1, 1-1); LW, 9
Last week: Idle
It’s a little baffling that Northwestern is the No. 1 team in the USA Today poll’s “receiving votes” portion. What exactly have the Wildcats done to inspire confidence? Was it the narrow escape act of a 1-point win at Minnesota, or the home loss to Purdue?
Next: vs. No. 8 Michigan State, Sat. 11 a.m. ESPN

10) Indiana (4-2, 0-2); LW, 10
Last week: won vs. Arkansas State 36-34
Hey, anytime you want two teams to combine for a 37-point fourth quarter, Indiana’s your team. Holding off Arkansas State for the win ... gotta love those Hoosiers and their non-conference scheduling.
Next: at Illinois, Sat. 11 a.m. BTN

11) Minnesota (1-6, 0-3); LW, 11
Last week: lost at Purdue 28-17
Here’s something to do with 15 seconds of spare time: imagine you were present in the NBC studios when Tony Dungy received a call investigating his interest in the Minnesota gig. Then imagine Dungy guffawing like Dom DeLuise in History of the World: Part I, and hanging up faster than you can say “Teach me how to Bucky”.
Next: vs. Penn State, Sat. 11 a.m. ESPNU

-AJ

Why the Badgers might (emphasis on, MIGHT) actually win the Big Ten and more College Football Preview

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Wait a second. I'm confused.

(And save the "you're always confused jokes...I'm only walking around confused 63 percent of the time.)

Why ARE the Wisconsin Badgers getting zero love from college football nation?


Try and remember, I'm not a Wisconsin "fan", per se. I want the team to do well, sure - I mean, it was always more enjoyable writing about a successful team during my 4 years in Wisconsin, the last three spent covering the football team. Besides, with more wins come more fan support, and thus more people reading your articles and what not. So naturally, now that I'm away from Madison, it's easier to support the team's success. But I still maintain that same sense of non-bias, trying to view all things Wisconsin with an objective eye.

That being said...I think this IS the year Wisconsin returns to prominence. Not completely, but this year marks the start.

The quarterback situation has never been better since Brooks Bollinger left in 2003 - I mean, did I actually see Scott Tolzien making plays last night? Never saw Evridge or Sherer or Donovan do that, and I would even argue that while John Stocco was grossly underappreciated and a good game manager, he's not exactly your sling-it-around kind of QB. As highly touted as Curt Phillips is, it says something that Scott Tolzien - donning my favorite football number, 16 - beat him out for the starting gig. Plus, Phillips is a viable option to take snaps and make plays with his legs.

John Clay is still John Clay, a bustout star waiting to happen. And just like the QBs, it must say something that Zach Brown is being considered the starter.

The wide receivers...my goodness, the wide receivers. We all know Nick Toon could rack up 1,000 yards this year, but how about Isaac Anderson? Maurice Moore looks solid too, and David Gilreath is still around, though his being shoved down the depth chart could positively impact his, uh, impact on special teams. (In the words of Bill Simmons, I swear that made sense when I wrote it.) Plus, Garrett Graham and Lance Kendricks should make sure the loss of Travis Beckum isn't too hard. Besides, Beckum missed most of last year anyway, so, you know, nbd.

Throw in the already solid special teams (let's hope Welch's worst night of the year was last night - two missed FGs and an extra point banged off the upright and in), and a defense that appears better than expected (O'Brien Schofield could be a BEAST, plus Mike Taylor and Chris Maragos made big plays last night), and...uh...yeah, why aren't the Badgers getting more respect?

Oh, yeah, they play in the Big Ten Conference.

No qualms there, really. The Big Ten doesn't "appear" to be down, Big Ten Network anchors slash fools and jesters. (Side note: now that I'm watching these games on TV, I'm realizing that the Big Ten Network is painfully bad. I love the principle, and it's nice to get more coverage to flyover state teams, but their programming is fairly pathetic.) The Big Ten IS down. It just is. Hey Ohio State and Iowa, seriously, it's okay to blow out Navy and Northern Iowa at home. Yo Minnesota, for all that talk of being so improved, it's not too impressive when you need overtime to beat a team with five wins in the last two years and is being led by a BASKETBALL POINT GUARD who's a nice story, but hasn't played football in five years. And Illinois? Hi. News flash: the season started. Yeah, it did. Yesterday. When you went out and got punked by Mizzou? (Yes, I'm a Mizzou fan, but still, humor me.) Maybe you want to show up for your nationally-televised opener and not let the Big XII have more ammo than it already has.

But therein lies my exact point with Wisconsin, and the No. 1 reason it's back: the SCHEDULE. Those four non-conference games - NIU, Fresno State, Wofford, and at Hawaii - are four guaranteed wins. Then you've got a Big Ten schedule highlighted by a visit to Columbus and...

...

...

um...

at Minnesota? Home for Michigan State or Iowa?

Please, somebody tell me why the Badgers CAN'T go 11-1 with that schedule. Sure, they'll go to a bowl game above their heads and get punked there, but the fan base has to be pleased with 11-1, right?

What I like about the result of last night's game is that national pundits will see the score - 28-20 over Northern Illinois - and think, oh, another Big Ten team barely surviving a lower-end team. But honestly, Wisconsin played MUCH better than that score indicates. It's a young team, it'll grow up and learn how to play 60 minutes. It's also a fairly beaten-up team right now (no starting center, no backup defensive ends to spell Schofield and Watt, no backup safeties due to suspension), so that situation will improve. If King Bielema can make better personnel and in-game decisions this season - which can only go up after the 2008 debacle - there's no reason why Wisconsin can't shock some people this season. And as I've been saying for about a year and a half...basically the ENTIRE offense returns in 2010. That's when I believe the Badgers are a down Terrelle Pryor year away from WINNING the Big Ten Conference, for sure.

As for 2009, I see them losing in Columbus, and possibly even at home to the Spartans. But that's it.

Write it down: the Badgers will win double digit games this year.

And with that, some final predictions that I swear weren't affected by yesterday's action:

Big Ten champ (runners-up): Michigan State (Penn State, with the Buckeyes and Badgers right behind)
Big XII: Texas (Oklahoma...better get well soon, Sammy...and Oklahoma State)
ACC: Florida State (Miami or Virginia Tech)
Big East: West Virginia (Pittsburgh or Rutgers)
Pac-10: USC (Cal and Oregon)
SEC: Florida (Georgia and Ole Miss)
Top Four BCS Busters: Brigham Young, Boise State, Central Florida and Tulsa (that's right, Tulsa)
Heisman Winner: Jesus-Man slash Tim Tebow (who else?)
Runners-up: Scott Tolzien. OK, no, kidding. Let's go Colt McCoy, Jahvid Best and Dez Bryant.
Which non-BCS team not from Idaho or Utah could crash the BCS party? Central Michigan
Which currently ranked team will not make a bowl game? North Carolina
Best BCS team to get left out of the BCS party: Alabama
BCS title game: Florida over Texas

Look for our MEGA-NFL season preview later this week. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to buy Rose Bowl tickets.

-AJ

The Morning Report, Vol. 1

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Ah, the first Saturday of college football. A tasty appetizer before the MAIN COURSE WHICH IS NOW JUST EIGHT DAYS AWAY WEEK 1 OF NFL WEEK 1 OF NFL OMIGOD OMIGOD...

Sorry about that. It's too early for outward emotion. But seriously, great day of college football ahead. For me personally, I'll be watching medleys all day.

11 am (CST):
Northern Iowa at No. 22 Iowa (my NEW local team)
Minnesota at Syracuse

2:30 pm:
Mizzou-RAH at Illinois
No. 13 Georgia at No. 9 Oklahoma State (let's go, Z-Rob)

6 PM:
Northern Illinois at Wisconsin (more on the Badgers later today)

7 PM:
No. 5 Alabama at No. 7 Virginia Tech


God, I miss Madison today. But anyhow...

Throw in a STAR-STUDDED day of U.S. Open tennis (Federer-Hewitt, Oudin-Sharpova in a battle of the hotties, Djokovic-Witten, Soderling-Querrey, Isner-Roddick, topped off by Blake-Robredo) and, um, why leave the house? Butt, meet couch. It's been a while.

But before we get started, here are six points to ponder in the first (and hopefully not last) installment of "The Morning Report", which'll rattle off some lingering thoughts when I wake up in the a.m.

• These Toaster Scrambles - bacon, egg and sausage - are deeeeeeeeeeeelicious.
  
• Watched Big Ten Cookout this morning, and it took me about 4.8 seconds to figure out that Melanie Collins - our April TNEA - is really dumb. Like, kind of unconsciously dumb. I'll cut her a break, since she's 22 and just getting started on TV (and apparently, BTN thinks it's a great idea to have a girl fresh out of college hosting important Saturday shows). But she's got a lot of work to do before entering the class of our girl EA. But still...you say Big Ten Cookout, I say "Stare at Melanie Collins' Rockin' Body For 30 Minutes." She is deeeeeeeeeeelicious.


• Answer to a previous tennis trivia question (Name the 11 American citizens to win a GS singles title in my lifetime): Sampras, Agassi, Roddick, Serena and Venus are the easy ones. The toughies? Jim Courier (4, a two pair of Aussies and Frenches between 1991-93), Michael Chang (the 1989 French, two months before Matt and Dan's births), Lindsay Davenport (every tournament but the French, between '98 and 2000), Jennifer Capriati (two Aussies and a French), and then the two American converts - Martina Navratilova and Monica Seles.


• After two rounds, heading into Labor Day weekend, my dad holds a slight 90-88 point lead over me in our U.S. Open draw. Overall, he has been better: all 8 of his quarterfinalists are still in tact and he didn't make a lot of dumb early picks. Despite me losing Mardy Fish as a quarterfinalists, my entire top half round of 16 is still in tact (and they could all win today too), which has helped me keep pace. Again, I have Murray beating Federer in the final, Dad has the opposite.


• Go ahead and Google "college football". This is the No. 2 hit. And this is the No. 9 hit. Gotta love the fact that college football has apparently become synonymous with Jenn Sterger. Google is awesome.


• Picks, picks, picks: I'll take Oklahoma State to barely fight off Georgia (best game of the day), No. 3 Oklahoma to sneak by No. 20 BYU, Northern Colorado to stun No. 25 Kansas in Lawrence in my upset special, Washington to topple No. 11 LSU in my other upset special, and No. 7 Virginia Tech to score a big BCS win over No. 5 Alabama tonight. Also give me Miami over host No. 18 Florida State in my third upset special on Monday, Michigan narrowly over Western Michigan, Wisconsin big over Northern Illinois (again, more on this later today), Illinois over Missouri, and common sense over LeGarrette Blount's stupidity.

College football preview coming later today! Enjoy Labor Day Weekend, everybody!

-AJ

Wisconsin: The Time of my Life

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So this is a little belated. About three weeks belated, actually. But I wrote the majority of this before graduation, and just finished it off today. It’s not particularly glory-trodden or even well-written, just a smattering of thoughts as I and many of my friends enter this scary place called the real world.

It’s been an extremely full three weeks; I’ve wrung my hands over job prospects, graduated from college, gotten the most gratifying phone call of my life from a little city I like to call Davenport (or the QC), said goodbye to Madison friends, returned to Denver, endured surgery for the first time in my life (hey, wisdom teeth: you suck), watched three Nuggets games from my couch in searing pain thanks to said wisdom teeth, said goodbye to Colorado friends, said an emotional goodbye to my family and to my hometown Denver, moved out of my apartment, said goodbye to the last of my Madison friends, and trucked on down to the QC (or Womanport … only one of you should get that joke, oops) to begin my career.

For those who didn’t catch the news in an earlier blog post, I will be reporting on high school sports for the Quad-City Times in Davenport, Iowa. As I said in that blog post, I feel extremely humbled to be granted this opportunity when there are currently so few opportunities to be had in this industry. I will certainly keep everybody posted on how it’s going; I’ll post as much as I can, but obviously, work comes first. Nonetheless, I’ll continue following Bucky from afar, just as I’m sure B-dubs will be keeping tabs on the Sooners as well.

But let’s get right to it. I wanted to write a few words about what college, Madison, and the University of Wisconsin has meant to me. This is for all the seniors who graduated with me last week, for all the Badger alumni who left before me, and for all our friends who are fortunate enough to return to Madison next fall as current students of the UW.

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I remember the 2005 U.S. Open for one distinct reason, and it has nothing to do with tennis. My dad went to Flushing that year, and he constantly reminds me of when he was watching my boyhood rival (okay, fine, that one racquet-wielding stud who I played once and got one game off of. Some rival), Kellen Damico, play in the U.S. Junior Open for the first time. I wanted to hear none of it. It was Saturday afternoon, before Labor Day and before classes began on Tuesday. I had been in Madison for about a week, and hated it. HATED it. I had no friends; I was way in over my head thinking how hotshot cool I was to be going to school where I knew nobody as opposed to my Chatfield North (er, University of Colorado) friends. I wanted to go home, and was seriously considering a transfer back to CU.

But as is usually the case, life works itself out. I made a bunch of friends on Witte 6B during a pickup football game. The Badger Herald entered my life during Week 2. And, of course, you meet people and meet people through people and eventually build up a friend base. That’s when I learned, you can’t make snap judgments on what something’s going to be like after too short a time period, whether it’s a new town or a girlfriend or an MLB team in late April. It’s a marathon, not a sprint. I almost sprinted my way back to Colorado, and I’m obviously glad I waited it out.

When I was fortunate enough to enter the ranks of the Herald sports editors as a freshman, that made for an unfortunate situation in that I had to leave that goofily-fun place after my sophomore year. It was disappointing that I couldn’t have spent more time there, but it did open up other opportunities with the Wisconsin State Journal and, later on, Janesville Gazette and Capital Times. My time with the Herald, Gazette and Cap Times are forever memorable, because I had the distinct pleasure of covering eight seasons’ worth of Badger athletics, both at home and on the road. Oh, those road trips. That’s the stuff college sportswriting is made of. The State Journal might not have opened those UW doors, but that’s particularly special because those sports assistant’s spots are where you really cut your teeth. I’ve now written four stories here in Davenport on high school baseball and soccer, and I can’t tell you how easy the transition has been because I did it for two years with the WSJ.

And then, senior year. The greatest year of my life, I’d say. Why? Well, it helps to be 21 in Madison. I never really was a big house party guy. And it helps to find a great living situation with a good roommate and an awesome apartment. And it helps to only take two classes your final semester so it’s a relatively low-stress way to go out.

But that’s not why. College will be missed not because of the town or the teams; they’ll always be there. It’s the people. And darnit, I’m gonna miss the 419ers.

I don’t wanna get all mushy on you guys, because hey, that’s not our style. Our style is all fun and games with just a touch of drama thrown in, which I love. But another style of mine, notoriously, has been enjoying a large group of acquaintances with the absence of truly close friends in my life. I was never one to have a tight-knit group around; I always preferred to move from friend base to friend base, keeping in touch with these acquaintances without having an entitled “best friend” or set-in-stone fallback group. Although the whole Badger Herald group came pretty close to that, it was a little tough for me as most of the sports people from my editing days were older and have moved on to Casper, Shawano, Nashville, Miami and elsewhere.

Then came the 419ers. Having that tight group that unequivocally loved hanging with each other multiple nights in a row, during class, after class, and the entire semester after our studio went dark, was a completely new experience for me. It made me a better person, for sure; and it was all a part of that newfound desire to soak up and enjoy college rather than viewing it as a four-year stopgap in life. I’m gonna miss all your crazy asses so much; obviously I’ll be up here again to relive our Nitty/Wando’s/Key/KK days, but on Zach’s recommendation, I call 419er road trip to visit me for the Wisconsin-Iowa basketball game in winter 2010. It might be a terrible matchup, but come on down anyways and we’ll show Iowa what the Four-One-Niners are made of.

Back to everyone else: that invitation is most definitely an open one to anybody who ever wants to visit the Quad Cities. You wanna come down and visit, just drop me a line and we’ll make it happen. I’m sure I’ll make plenty of friends in Davenport, but it’s always special to see old chums from Madison too.

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I've definitely had a great run here. To me, it's beyond senseless that I was graduating high school four years ago. Forty-eight months ago. I mean, really, it feels weird typing that. College felt like it lasted 10-15 years, seriously. Without exaggeration. Probably because I lived so many different lives...the Herald, two different dorm floors, the State Journal, the club tennis team, my Jewish friends, the Janesville Gazette, covering eight different seasons of football/basketball/hockey/volleyball, Badger Nation, driving to something like 30 out-of-town games and tournaments to cover the Badgers, all my J-School friends, the Capital Times, and finally this final year of enjoying the bar scene when I was more reserved in my pre-21 days. I absolutely soaked everything I could out of the University of Wisconsin, and just can't believe it's over. The reason I was sentimental in that blog post is because during my frosh and soph years (and even some of junior year), I was like, I can't wait to get a job, be out of school, make money, start on my quest for ESPN or SI or what have you. Then finally, senior year, I realized how much I'll miss this place, that it was much, MUCH more than a stepping stone. So, yeah, it's become an emotional transitional period.

What did Wisconsin teach me? The easy answer is that I gained great perspective on how to properly balance the work ethic in your life with some fun. With regards to all my great memories with the Wisconsin State Journal and UW Tennis Club, making the tough decision to part ways with those two organizations freed up my time much more, and allowed me to respect that balance.

To that end, I’ll close with this. To all my Wisconsin professors, you guys are the best. Keep churning out great writers; there’s so much talent on this campus and in this J-school, there’s unbelievable opportunity to keep the Wisco tradition thriving.

To all my bosses, I’m not here without you. Thanks for giving me a shot, the experiences were invaluable.

To the aspiring sportswriters reading this – heck, to anybody with a “crazy” dream who’s trying to figure out what they’re trying to do with their life – that you should never, EVER, stop dreaming. More importantly, don’t stop believing.

And finally, to wrap up in an appropriate manner (since it is, you know, about Graduation). To everyone still in college thinking that it’s going to last forever: it won’t. It may have seemed like 10 years to me, but everyone else is right on that it does go by quickly. When it does come to an end, you’re going to wish like hell you had more time. Soak up college life for everything it’s worth, because it truly is…the time of your life.

_____________________________Taste every moment.
_______________________________Live it out loud.
__________________________This is the time to be more
_______________________Than a name or a face in the crowd.
____________________________I know this is the time,
___________________________This is the time of my life.
________________________________-David Cook

Talk to you all later. Good luck to all of you on your journeys, and please, PLEASE, keep in touch in any way you wish.

-AJ

BREAKING NEWS: Wisconsin changes student ticket system

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According to our friends over at the Badger Herald, the University of Wisconsin is finally changing its student season ticket policy. An e-mail from the athletic department reads that UW is doing away with the controversial lottery system that has plagued football fans for the past two years and reverting back to the first-come, first-served system.

I wrote a guest column for the Herald about a month ago on this topic, from the basketball point of view - though it is relevant to football. Another former BH sports editor, Derek Zetlin, is no doubt rejoicing today over in Prague.

To sum up the problems in one paragraph, UW changed to a lottery system in reaction to a 2007 e-mail glitch where half the student body didn't even know football tickets were on sale before they were completely sold out...and because the school felt like giving everybody an equal chance at tickets, regardless of whether or not you can name three Badgers without the use of a game-issued program. As a result, many "real" fans were left without tickets, you had a student section that was commonly 60, 70, even 80 percent empty at kickoff...and worse, thousands of kids entered the lottery with the sole intention of winning tickets and immediately turning them around on Facebook marketplace or Craigslist for three times face value. Just an ugly situation all the way around that hopefully is being changed for 2009.

Jordan Schelling, currently the associate sports editor at the Herald and the man who alerted me to this development, will be writing a column on this ticket policy change in Tuesday's paper. Check that out tomorrow at badgerherald.com.

-AJ

Eben Britton Will End You and more Case of the Mondays

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Mile High Musings for a Monday morning after turning 22 years old and spending the day wondering – pondering, even – if I should follow in Chad Johnson’s footsteps and change my name to “Double Deuce”…

I think I learned this weekend the biggest reason the NFL Draft annoys me is because we just don’t know what the heck the teams are thinking. I still watch it because it is entertaining and there’s a hopeful aura that your team picks well-known names that fit your team’s needs.

But we won’t know how this draft class will pan out for a few seasons after Mr. Irrelevant’s name is called, and you usually just walk away wondering why your team didn’t follow what ESPN experts were saying they should have done.

You do have to love the seventh round of the NFL draft. Here were some of the names taken in the first eight picks of the Irrelevant round: Chris Ogbannaya, Paul Fanaika, Taufui Vakapuna, Edjuan Biggers, and – my personal favorite – Captain Munnerlyn. Yarrr, Captain!

Wow, way to spit on your fans, Denver Broncos. You honestly thought reaching for the best running back in the draft about ten spots too high was going to woo your fan base? We’re not stupid, Josh McDaniels.

It’s obvious the problem last year was defense, notably getting to the quarterback and stopping the run. So why, why, why in the world did you take your ten picks and use just four of them on defense – and only one pick (Robert Ayers) on the front seven???? WHY????

But hey, the ex-Patriot McDaniels did manage to select a sixth-round quarterback whose name starts with "Tom Bra...."

I'm not sayin', I'm just sayin'.

And at least the Broncos didn’t pick a wide receiver No. 7 when he was a questionable first-rounder…with Michael Crabtree perfectly available. Or a cornerback in the second round when Senor Hairpiece vehemently argued he could’ve been signed in free agency.

Could be a fun column sometime: What are the five worst franchises in sports? Al Davis' Raiders are right up there.

How about this story out of Jacksonville? Sounds like somebody took their cocky pills Saturday. Eben Britton, the Jags' second pick - and second offensive tackle, after Eugene Monroe - apparently got an A in self-confidence class. Have a look at some of his quotes, after sliding down out of the first round and into the 39th overall selection:

“I couldn’t be happier that to be picked by the Jacksonville Jaguars but I was (ticked) off. There isn’t a bigger organization that I could have asked for, but every team that passed on me will regret it for the rest of the history of that franchise.”

“I was always told I wasn’t big enough, fast enough to play. Well, the chip (on my shoulder) just got a little bigger and somebody’s going to pay.”

So what's your career plans, Eben?

“I want to lead the Jacksonville Jaguars to the Super Bowl and I want to become the greatest tackle in the history of the NFL.”

Oh. Okay. What do you think of Mel Kiper Jr. and Todd McShay?

“You know what, if one of these draft guys lined up across from me, they’d be dead, so that’s not something I’m really concerned with. If you want to line up across from Eben Britton, you’re going to know what’s happening to you, I guarantee you that.”

Eben Britton sure knows what Eben Britton wants. Here's guessing we never hear from Eben Britton again.

The NBA has passed a new law. When the Celtics need a three-pointer in the final 30 seconds of a basketball game, the opposing coach must – MUST – double-team Ray Allen and tell his two guards, “I don’t care if they pick and roll, if they penetrate and kick, if they bring out the Patriots’ offensive line to block for Ray Allen or if Ray takes the shot from the popcorn stand in section 218. If you let Allen have any more than three and a half inches of open space during this next possession, you both will be on a bus heading to the D-League before the final horn.”

The next coach who fails to do this is breaking the law…and should be on a bus heading to coach D-League before the final horn.

Why? This. (32 second mark)

And this.

And this.

And this.

And, finally, this.

Get the picture, Bulls?

My roommate Justin’s take on the Cleveland-Detroit series, when ABC cut away from the scintillating Bulls-Celtics game to LeBron warming up for a Game 4 promo: “They’re gonna win by 70.”

And the sad thing is, my immediate response was, ‘well, not quite. But they’ll be close. The scrubs will whittle it down to a 50-point win.’

I think it’s safe to say Denver won the Chauncey-Iverson trade.

News: Despite legitimate speculation that the University of Wisconsin would not put a single prospect into the first three rounds of this weekend’s NFL Draft, four Badgers were taken in the third round after a UW-less Day 1. Matt Shaughnessy (Oakland), Kraig Urbik (Pittsburgh) and DeAndre Levy (Detroit) were taken eight spots apart in the 70s picks, and Travis Beckum (New York Giants) was the 100th overall pick and the final selection of the third round.

Views: I have to tip my cap to Wisconsin, which must be proud of being just one of seven schools to produce four draft picks in the first three rounds (or, if this was last year or any prior year, four first-day selections.) Granted, nobody was actually a first-day pick in 2009, but when nobody figures you to have anybody gone in the first three rounds, four Badgers bucking the scout’s take is a nice trend.

More views: That all being said, what does that tell you about the 2009 Badgers, having just lost four top-100 players from a 7-6 team? As Scooby-doo might say…Ruh roh.

The above clip shows Jacoby Ellsbury stealing home against the Yankees, helping the Red Sox earn a three-game sweep.

Apparently the results Boston-New York rivalry is something like 52-51 since the start of the 2004 season. Coulda fooled me. It seems like the Sox absolutely own the Yankees every time they play.

But back to Ellsbury’s domestic burglary: check out the 1:15 mark. So the bases are loaded. Andy Pettitte is a left-handed pitcher who takes forever to throw a pitch out of the full, and can’t see Ellsbury. The Yankee third baseman (don’t know who it is, too lazy to look it up, all I know is it’s not A-Roid) isn’t holding on Ellsbury, who is as sneaky as he is fast.

With there being a left-handed hitter at the plate facing a lefty pitcher, the chances are slim that a ball will be hit to the third-base area. And Ellsbury took a giant lead before he even took off…he had such a great jump that he stumbled the last two steps and still got in safely.

What did we learn from this little event? That maybe the Yankees should have kept some of that $423.5 million they gave to CC/Tex/Burnett and spent it on, you know, sensible coaching with common sense.

Later this week, I’ll have my annual birthday wishes column, along with a little piece on a beloved event held in Madison each year that according to a friend of mine, doubled as “the world’s largest wet t-shirt contest” in 2009.

Apparently, State of Play is “sooooooo damn good.” I’ll have to see if it’s as good as Taken.

Family Guy with an off week, after a hilarious episode last Sunday. Hopefully this doesn’t start a downward spiral. And that’s all I have to say about that.

Have a good one.

-AJ

We Are...Columbine and more Case of the Mondays

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Mile High Musings on a Monday morning hangover from a great, great NBA weekend with excitement that’s overshadowed only by sorrowed memories on this 10th anniversary of one of the greatest tragedies in American history.

I went to Chatfield Senior High, the (former) rival school of Columbine High School. Ten years ago, on April 20, 1999, I think everybody's life was changed forever: students and teachers, children teenagers and adults, Coloradans and all Americans. I didn't personally know anybody involved with the attacks, though I have several friends who knew students that witnessed the attacks or were injured during Columbine.

The week that it happend, the entire Bradford Elementary sixth grade was in southwestern Colorado at Crow Canyon, near the four corners. I'll never forget the teachers calling us into a large meeting room just after dark and Ms. Auger telling us what news they had received - "Today was a terrible day for Denver", she began. I'll never forget the hush that fell over the room as Ms. Auger divulged the details, telling us with a crack in her voice that our school and schools around Jefferson County were on lockdown and that everyone at our school was safe. I'll really never forget being scared out of my you-know-what thinking about my little brothers, Matt and Dan, who were fourth-graders at Bradford that day and kept locked inside the school until the coast was announced as clear. I'll never forget how shocked everybody was, the tears shed that night (and remember, these were 12-year-olds, a few years away from high school). And most importantly, I'll never forget the impact Columbine had on all of us in the Jeffco community, and I'm sure the same goes for schools and cities around the country.

We love you, Columbine, and will never forget.

Just for today, the blog will be navy blue, Columbine's primary color...so please forgive anything that's hard to read.

Now on to the Musings…

• Ranking the eight NBA series from least interesting to most interesting, taking into account each of the Game Ones from the weekend…
  8. Cleveland-Detroit - thought the Pistons would've put up more of a fight
  7. Los Angeles-Utah - not good when Coach throws in the towel before game one
  6. Atlanta-Miami - looks like D-Wade isn't Superman after all...
  5. Denver-New Orleans - ...same goes for Chris Paul...
  4. Orlando-Philadelphia - ...and for Dwight Howard. Team before individuals, I guess.
  3. San Antonio-Dallas - can San Antonio fight off its biggest rival sans Manu?
  2. Portland-Houston - will take an awful lot for Baby Blazers to forget about 108-81
  1. Boston-Chicago - the champs are wounded. Can the Bulls take advantage?
• You may have noticed a common theme. The four most interesting series saw the road underdog take Game 1; Nos. 5 and 6 on the list went to the home team, but are still competitive series; and the two most boring series have already been decided for all intents and purposes.
• Other than Utah and Detroit (who limped into the playoffs and have terrible, terrible matchups), we've got 14 quality playoff teams on our hands. I'm not going to get on a soapbox here - just check out my chalky bracket - but I'm not at all surprised that four of the six road underdogs not playing Cleveland or LA have stolen home advantage in the opening games.
• Today, we spell redemption: AI. Miss two freebies late, make up for it with a game-winning, off-balance jumper in the last two seconds. What a finish for Andre Iguodala.
• My, that Derrick Rose is impressive. And such an improved free-throw shooter ... think John Calipari would've liked to have some of those back, say, a year and two weeks ago?
• Hi, Ray? Ray Allen? Wake up. The playoffs started. And no KG around to help you. Time to play.



• Hats off to Denver and Atlanta for paying attention to Saturday's upsets and taking care of their business at home.
• Anyone who thinks the Hawks can't give the Cavs a heck of a run might be in for a surprise. That defense is shockingly underrated; they would just have to find a way to neutralize LeBron, somehow.
• And anyone who still says the Nuggets CAN'T beat the Lakers is dead wrong. I don't think the Nuggets, should the matchup occur, will beat LA. I wouldn't bet that Denver would do so, I wouldn't bet on theDenver even if you gave me good odds. But Denver CAN beat the Lakers. You can't tell me that LA's half-assed defense can just extinguish all that firepower without breaking a sweat.
• Joe Dumars, your thank-you note is in the mail. Not for Carmelo; for Chauncey.
• And my final NBA-related thought: Inside the NBA talent and producers, never change. That is, without match or master, the greatest sports studio show on television. They even talk about professional basketball every now and then. But only on occasion.





• Covered the Wisconsin Spring Game on Saturday. According to UW's "estimated attendance" as it was announced, 23,500 fans were there in the rain to watch a 56-20 blowout that didn't tell us much about the 2009 Badgers other than that Curt Phillips might have a shot at the starting QB position.
• How far off is that "estimate"? Put it this way: if I had a dollar for every fan there, and had to give a dollar back for every fan under the 23,500 mark that actually showed up, I'd be more broke than Michael Vick.
• I just don't get the need to lie about attendance figures. No shame in the fact that people outside SEC country just don't care about football in April.
• But from a football standpoint, the Badgers will probably struggle again in '09. Now, 2010...that's a different story.
• Let's say Phillips wins the job this year. The 2010 Badgers will feature returning starters at every offensive position except tight end Garrett Graham, the entire defensive line, two linebackers, both corners and both kicker and punter.
• That's UW's best shot to get back to a Rose Bowl. With as few seniors as there are this year, it kinda makes sense for Bret Bielema to make the tough decision, play Phillips this season and hope that Dustin Sherer, an improving pocket passer and a genuinely nice kid, understands.



• So, Brooklyn Decker decided to marry Andy Roddick. A good-looking 26-year-old tennis player who's made it some sort of personal vendetta to nail as many Hollywood hotties as he can, wedded to a 22-year-old Sports Illustrated model who's been famous for about two years and could get anybody she wants. And both travel around the world nonstop for their profession.
• Gee, if that's not the perfect recipe for longterm marital success, I don't know what is.
• And get this, something I learned yesterday: you know how they met? Roddick saw her picture in the '07 SI Swimsuit edition and, like every other red-blooded male, developed an instant crush. So he got his agent to track down her number, tried to score a date for five months - Decker admitted "I was stalked" - and eventually, she fell for it.
• Seriously, Vegas has got to have this on the board somewhere: over/under for how many months before the divorce.
• And if you've got this crazy idea about me being super-jealous and bordering on uncontrollable bitterness...you'd be right on, buckaroo.



• My preseason World Series pick is 11-1. I’m not sayin, I’m just sayin.
• Then again, my fantasy team is in last place by a solid four games (record after two weeks: 8-22-6), and my real-life team has lost six of seven (Rockies chances of a division title after two weeks: zero). So we’ve got some work to do there (realizing that baseball is complete guesswork and it’s better to be lucky than good, thus also realizing I hate baseball: priceless).



• That Heineken commercial with the four screaming guys was funny the first time. Heck, it was entertaining the first eight or nine viewings. But it's gotten old, guys.



• Family Guy last night – easily the funniest of the season – was titled “420” and all about legalizing pot. The very first commercial once the episode ended? One of those ‘Above the Influence’ spots. Coincidence? If so, that automatically wins the award for “Most Hilarious Irony of All-Time”.
• Watching Family Guy’s newest ensemble “Bag of Weed” where Brian and Stewie , which took us into commercial and Burger King’s newest commercial where the King raps “SpongeBob SquarePants” to the tune of Baby Got Back, was one of the strangest five minutes of my life involving back-to-back songs that make you stare at the television with your eyes bugging and jaw slacked, unsure whether to be humored or terrified by what you just saw. And that’s all I have to say about that.
  
  

Have a good one.

-AJ