Thursday, October 29, 2009

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Who's it gonna be ... Phillies or Yankees?

So instead of B-dubs or me writing 6,000 words on the Fall Classic (shouldn't that be the Winter Classic?), I took a sampling from a few people who know things.

First, some quick-hit thoughts ... Who will win the World Series?

Matt Brenner: Phillies, cuz the Yankees suck. 6 games.

Jordan Schelling: Yankees in 4

Michael Bleach: Yankees in 5 ... Cliff Lee will win a game for the Phillies

Dan Brenner: Well, I'm not a psychic or anything, but the Yankees will win in five games. But I'm rootin' for the Phillies.

Carlyn Burris: Where's the NL spirit?!? Phillies sweep. (Won't actually happen but one can hope)

Mike Lemar: Yankees because I said so. They'll probably win it 4-2.

Then, our good friend Joseph Rower chimes in with a little more...

Joseph Rower: Yankees in 7.

"When have we seen a postseason where no series had any sort of "do-or-die drama, game 7 winner moves on" magic? Well, it hasn't happened yet (I mean, you really thought the Angels were going to force game 7 against Andy Pettitte?), so I'm thinking now is the time.

"On paper, the teams are evenly matched. Lee vs CC, the great Pedro vs Burnett, Hamels vs Pettitte. If each of those pitchers pitches as they're capable, it is going to be a long series for the hitters. If they're a bit off, well, they're are enough hitters on both sides to make them pay. Who is more fearsome than Jeter, Damon, Tex, A-Rod ... only Rollins, the Flyin' Hawaiian, Utley, and the Big Dog Ryan Howard? You throw Matt Stairs into the mix in Yankee Stadium and the Phils lineup looks as good as any AL team's.

"Obviously the Yanks have a better 3B and catcher offensively, but the Phils OF is more dangerous than the Yanks. Phils win the managerial war, and I think that buys them an extra game. Girardi just isn't seasoned enough. Bullpen success will be dependent on the managers ... as Jim Tracy did so well this year, success is so often about putting your players in a position to succeed rather than fail. Lidge looks like October reminded him what he is capable of, and so the 9th inning looks solid for both clubs. I'm not sure which way to go in the intangibles ... both play in hitters' ballparks, both have rabid fans, Phils were here last year, Yanks act like this is their birthright. Each game is going to be competitive, close, and intense.

"I'm seeing game 7 coming down to a 2-1 Phils lead going into the bottom of the 8th against the top of the Yanks order...A-Rod hitting a bomb to put the Yanks in the lead and the great Mo coming in to close it out.

"In short:
The Phillies spend like few other NL teams, but the Yanks make them look like a cheapy market team. The offseason duo of CC and Tex come up big for the Yanks, and a close Series ends in a dramatic game 7 with the Yankees being given the title they paid for last winter."

Now, we've got two special guests with us today. The first is Stephen Watson, UW athletic communications extraordinaire and true-blooded Phillies fan.

S-dub writes the following:

"We have some big names, but we don't have bona fide superstars, or a special set of rules for certain players. Everyone here is the same, from Ryan Howard to Antonio Bastardo. Or they're treated the same. The expectations are the same. And because of that, you know where you stand every day."
-Jimmy Rollins

I think that speaks perfectly to the Phillies. They have a swagger about them that I just love and it makes them a threat. They are a team, not just an A-Rod or a Jeter or a Sabathia.

Also, the Phillies hit 10 homers by 6 different players against the Dodgers. They scored at least 8 runs in three of the five games (something they will need to do to beat the Yankees).

I know that CC is not pitching with the Brewers behind him anymore, but the Philles did a good job against him last postseason (5 runs in 3 innings). And lets be honest, the Phillies offense is exponentially better than last year.

CC has been Superman for the Yankees, but they are finally going to play a 7-game series in 9 days. They recently played 9 games in a span of 22 days, so I think that will wear down their pitching staff. The Phillies have been able to adjust to that schedule already.

As the Phillies proved in both series thus far, they can battle back from pretty much any series. Even if our starting pitching falls through, our offense can bounce back and get some runs late in games (ex. 3 runs in the 9th, 2 of which with 2 outs in game 4 of the NLCS).

So that's my argument. Am I nervous? Of course, it's the Yankees. With a payroll that high, they should be the best team. But I love this Philadelphia team and I think they have great charisma that could provide an upset.

Our second guest? My very own uncle, Dennis Rabida, who likes only a good horse race more than his beloved Yanks.

Yanks in 6. Three simple words: CC, A-Rod, and Mo.

Succinctly said, Uncle Buck.

Oh, wait, wanna know what I think? I'll channel my inner Rower and try to see my way through the series. I see Cliff Lee continuing his dominance in game 1, shocking the Yankees and triggering 58 hours of "uh oh, the Yanks might choke" programming on ESPN. Then NY will take game 2, showing Pedro once and for all who his daddy is. The Phillies will then proceed to take 2 out of 3 back in the CoBL, capped by one more dominating performance by Lee in game 5, making it look very much like we'll be seeing the rarest of rarities in a repeat champ.

And then the series will go back to New York, and their bevy of stars will show what they're made of. Which is more than just hundred-dollar bills.

The pick: Yankees in 7.

(Oh, yeah, and GO NUGGETS!!!!!!)


Monday, October 26, 2009

Big Ten Power Poll: Week 9

1) Iowa (8-0, 4-0; last week, 1)
Do you believe in miracles? Captain Kirk does.

2) Penn State (7-1, 3-1; last week, 2)
Gorgeous story on Joe by Joe: that is, on Joe Paterno, by new Sports Illustrated writer Joe Posnanski. I guess I’m in a linky mood today.

3) Ohio State (6-2, 4-1 Big Ten; last week, 4)

At Penn State. Home for Iowa. At Michigan. That’s the remaining Buckeye schedule (sans this week’s out-of-conference laugher against New Mexico State.) Maybe it’s not enough to get back to the BCS title game, but if the Sweater Vest wins out, that’s probably enough to get into the BCS party, at least.

4) Wisconsin (5-2, 2-2; last week, 6)
The Badgers go 0-0-1 last week, they move up two spots in these rankings … and the student section STILL doesn’t show up until the second quarter. Figures.

5) Michigan State (4-4, 3-2; last week, 3)
What? They played gamely at home against a top-five team and came within a Marvin McNutt play of beating them? And they drop two spots? Yer darn right they do. I watched the whole game. That was ugly football, and nothing convinced me the Spartans are an elite Big Ten team.

6) Michigan (5-3, 1-3; last week, 5)
Yikes … so much for that encouraging start. At least the Wolverines are going orange for Halloween – the Fighting Illini are hardly frightening these days.

7) Purdue (3-5, 2-2; last week, 7)
Bucky would be wise to watch out for that trap door in front of him. (Or her. Is Bucky a him or a her? I think it’s a him. Am I rambling again?)

8) Minnesota (4-4, 2-3; last week, 8)
Finally turned it over to Marquise Gray, after Adam Weber was literally “point”less for eight quarters. So much for the Gophers turning a corner.

9) Northwestern (5-3, 2-2; last week, 9)
The Wildcats might only win one more game this year (home for Penn State and Wisconsin, at Iowa and Illinois). That would be enough to make them bowl-eligible for the third straight year, but then again, 6-6 wasn’t enough in 2007.

10) Indiana (4-4, 1-3; last week, 10)
The Hoosiers were up 28-3 on Northwestern Saturday. They should be 5-3 right now. Instead, the remaining schedule screams 4-8. Still an upgrade from what we thought Indiana would produce.

11) Illinois (1-6, 0-5; last week, 11)
What if … WHAT IF … the Illini were just screwing with us, and they come out and hammer Cincinnati on Thanksgiving weekend and spoil the Bearcats’ season? Now THAT would make Illinois’ season. Unlikely, but what if?

Coming Tuesday: Riverside Rants (Halloween edition)
Coming Wednesday: World Series preview
Coming Thursday: Slightly belated NBA season preview
Coming Friday: NFL Power Rankings and Jump Around Remix standings


Thursday, October 22, 2009

Top Ten Denver Trades of the Past 15 Years

10) Feb. 22, 2001: Avalanche receive Rob Blake and Steve Reinprecht (the Badger!) from Kings for Adam Deadmarsh, Aaron Miller, and a first-rounder

9) Dec. 13, 2006: Rockies receive Willy Taveras, Taylor Buchholz and Jason Hirsh from Astros for Jason Jennings and Miguel Asencio

8) April 2, 2009: Broncos receive Kyle Orton, two first-rounders and a third-rounder from Bears for Jay Cutler

7) March 4, 2004: Broncos receive Champ Bailey and a second-rounder from Redskins for Clinton Portis

6) Dec. 19, 2006: Nuggets receive Allen Iverson and Ivan McFarlin from 76ers for Andre Miller, Joe Smith, and two first-rounders

5) Nov. 12, 2008: Rockies receive Carlos Gonzalez, Huston Street and Greg Smith from Athletics for Matt Holliday

4) Dec. 6, 1995: Avalanche receive Patrick Roy and Mike Keane from Canadiens for Jocelyn Thibault, Martin Rucinsky and Andrei Kovalenko

3) March 6, 2000: Avalanche receive Ray Bourque and Dave Andreychuk from Bruins for Brian Rolston, Martin Grenier, Samuel Pahlsson and a first-rounder

2) Nov. 3, 2008: Nuggets receive Chauncey Billups, Antonio McDyess and Cheikh Samb from Pistons for Allen Iverson

1) June 30, 1992: Quebec Nordiques trade C Eric Lindros to Flyers for C Peter Forsberg, C Mike Ricci, G Ron Hextall, D Steve Duchesne, D Kerry Huffman, F Chris Simon, two first-round picks (eventually G Jocelyn Thibault and F Nolan Baumgartner) and $15 million

Thibault was traded straight-up for some other goaltender. His name is Patrick Roy. He was somewhat important to the franchise.

Through a long, winded road that Sports Illustrated, well, illustrated about 6 years ago, the Avs ended up using components of that trade to land defensemen Ray Bourque and Rob Blake. Those two - you know, along with everybody else - were instrumental in winning the 2001 Stanley Cup.

The hilarious part of this trade is the $15 million. And the two draft picks. Like five players wasn't enough. Thank you, Philadelphia. The Avs enjoyed unbelievable glory years because of you. In the words of John Kelly: "Thank you, thank you, thank you!"

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Big 12 Power Poll

Ok AJ... I guess I will throw my 2 cents in as well....

1) Texas (6-0, 3-0, Last Week #1)
The Big 12 is down this year. Texas MUST go undefeated to make the National title game. If not, they still make a BCS bowl. Not a bad deal if you are a longhorn fan. But if you miss the title game... I hope to God you lose to Boise in Phoenix. I think this team is overrated. Their defense is pretty good, but their offense is not what it was last year. They could slip up against OSU in Stillwater or even at Mizzou this weekend. Bowl Prediction: Fiesta

2) Oklahoma (3-3, 1-1, Last Week #2)
I'm not a homer. I'm not a homer. I'm not a homer. Maybe if I tell myself that enough times I will believe it. Look, there is only one team in the league with more losses. But the three losses are by 1, 1, 3... against, #20, #17, #3. They lost their best receiver (Gresham) before the season and their Heisman Trophy winner has played a total of 2.5 quarters all season. Yet, they have been in every game. Their defense is legit. They have the 8th ranked yardage defense and 3rd ranked scoring defense with that gauntlet of a schedule. They have the potential to win out and if they do they should be back in the top-10-15. The fact of the matter is... they would beat every team below them in this poll if they played today. This is a beat-up team, but they are still good. A few plays go differently and this team is in the top 5 right now. Bowl Prediction: Cotton Bowl
3) Oklahoma State (5-1, 2-0, Last Week #6)
They have recovered well from the upset vs Houston. They beat Missouri pretty good. They still have Texas, OU, and Tech left. They need two of three of those to make the Cotton Bowl... they only win one. Bowl Prediction: Holiday Bowl
4) Texas Tech (5-2, 2-1, Last Week #7)
The Red Raiders look pretty darn good. Their only Big-12 loss is to Texas. They are firing on all cylinders with their back-up QB. They still have OU and Oklahoma State on their schedule. If they can split those games, they will be in great shape for a good bowl game. Bowl Prediction: Gator Bowl

5) Kansas (5-1, 1-1, Last Week #4)
Well that game in Boulder was not pretty. We already knew it, but it was confirmed last week... Kansas has no defense. None. In a conference with a lot of offense, it doesn't look good for Kansas. The Reesing and Briscoe combo can only win you so many games. With Zero shoe-in wins left, Kansas is going to have to play near perfect football to make a bowl game. Good luck Jayhawks. Alamo Bowl

6) Nebraska (4-2, 1-1, Last Week #5)
They got beat by a superior team, but it wasn't even close. The defense just didn't have an answer for Tech's high powered offense. They were at home too. This game proved to me just how far the gap is between the north and south. Bowl prediction: Insight Bowl

7) Missouri (4-2, 0-2, Last Week #3)
A tough loss to Nebraska. Tough tough loss. The hangover showed against OSU. This team just isn't that good. They don't have a consistent offense and with a mediocre defense... they just aren't an elite Big-12 team. I am feeling a bowl game, but something along the lines of the Furniture Meinke Car Brakes bowl. Bowl Prediction: Independence Bowl

8) Kansas State (4-3, 2-0, Last Week NR)
Woah! The Wildcats are leading the Big-12 North... why are they not above those other north teams?? Oh thats right... their wins were vs. Iowa State and Texas A&M. These Wildcats still aren't too hot, but they have a chance at a bowl game. Bowl Prediction: Texas Bowl

9) Iowa State (4-3, 1-2, Last Week #9)
Every Big-12 game has been a nail biter for the Cyclones. Unfortunately only one win to show for it and it was against a Griffin-less Baylor. The bright side is that you have 2 very winnable games left against CU and A&M. But will 6-6 be good enough for a bowl game? No.

10) Colorado (2-4, 1-1, Last Week NR)
I am ranking the Buffs ahead of Baylor just because of their win against ranked Kansas. With two wins thus far... its going to take a hell of a run for Dan Hawkins keep his job.

Others Receiving Votes:
Its too bad that Robert Griffin got hurt, but Baylor cant do anything without him.
Texas A&M:
Quality Wins: UAB, New Mexico, and Utah State... quality not so much. Also when you get beat by Kansas St but 50.... you head straight to the cellar of the rankings.

Stay Classy,

Big Ten Power Poll

1) Iowa (7-0, 3-0; last week, 2)
People in these here parts – and for those of you who don’t know, these here parts for me these days is Iowa – still aren’t sure if the Hawkeyes can make the national title game. Ummmm…why not?

They’re sixth in the first BCS rankings, just a tiny, tiny smidgen behind No. 5 Cincy. They’re third – THIRD! – in the computers. Previous wins at Penn State, at Wisconsin and against Iowa State are impressive. Wins at Michigan State and Ohio State would be even more impressive – in other words, the schedule allows them to do this. IF they run the table.

I’ll come out and say it: IF Iowa goes 12-0, it is better than a coin flip that the Hawkeyes will play for the national championship. Big IF, though.

2) Penn State (6-1, 2-1; last week, 3)
Still just the one blemish against Iowa at home. Penn State will be licking its chops and chasing Iowa the rest of the year.

3) Michigan State (4-3, 3-1; last week, 6)
And back come the Spartans, reeling off a three-game winning streak. Could the top spot in these rankings – not to mention a Rose Bowl trip – be on the line Saturday night in East Lansing?

4) Ohio State (5-2, 3-1 Big Ten; last week, 1)
And the nation breathes. The Buckeyes won’t be playing in Pasadena this year – not in the title game, anyway.

5) Michigan (5-2, 1-2; last week, 5)
Wow, Michigan. Delaware State. Let’s see if that gets you good and tested for the visiting Nittany Lions this week.

6) Wisconsin (5-2, 2-2; last week, 4)
“It’s not how you start, but how you finish.” I’m guessing Bret needed new markers after writing that phrase in the locker room whiteboard about 650 times.

7) Purdue (2-5, 1-2; last week, 9)
Hey! There are the Boilermakers in which I saw potential! Nice – very nice – win for Danny Hope and the program.

8) Minnesota (4-3, 2-2; last week, 7)
The Gophers could use a split of this road swing at Penn and Ohio. Couldn’t reel in the first – and it doesn’t look good against the Buckeyes, who should be hopping mad.

9) Northwestern (4-3, 1-2; last week, 8)
“Party in the USAAAAAAAAAAA” Darn it, obnoxious Miley Cyrus song, get out of my head! (Sorry. Couldn’t think of anything interesting to say about Northwestern.)

10) Indiana (4-3, 1-2; last week, 10)
If the Hoosiers and Illini play a night game on Big Ten Network and nobody watches, does it actually count? It does? Really?

11) Illinois (1-5, 0-4; last week, 11)
Ummmm…basketball season is around the corner? There you go. I knew I could cheer up the Champaign crew.

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

TNEA of the Month REPLACEMENT?!?!?!

.This ... is unprecedented.

Not once in the long, storied, six-month history of The Other B.S. Report have we selected a replacement for TNEA of the Month, halfway through the month. But a) the Dallas Stars Ice Chicks were a cop-out, and b) this one couldn't wait, due to Saturday's circumstances.
I am taking a risk here. A risk of losing my co-blogger. But I don't care.

Rachel Glandorf, the girlfriend of Colt McCoy, isn't just a smokin' hot former Baylor track athlete. She does some TV spots for a CBS station in Texas, on the Longhorns. So, in honor of the upcoming Red River Rivalry Game, I present to you, Ms. Glandorf (on the left). Oklahoma fans, enjoy.

And a YouTube clip, too...

And a Colt picture, just for good measure...


Tuesday, October 6, 2009

Terrific Tiebreakers and Playoff Picks

You all better thank the Minnesota Twins and Detroit Tigers for putting on one hell of a show Tuesday night. They just saved you about 14,000 words of kisses and flowers toward the Rockies.

Instead, the Twinkies' 12-inning win has inspired me to talk about something else, so I'll just say a few words about ROCKTOBER.

First off, my Sportsman of the Month goes to Jim Tracy. September wasn't his best month, no, but it's a Lifetime Achievement pick, and by lifetime, I mean since June. Thankfully, just about every baseball writer I've seen has picked Tracy over Tony La Russa for NL Manager of the Year, so Rox fans won't be alone in crying bloody murder if La Russa wins the award. But I do truly feel that Tracy entered the "If He Doesn't Win This Award Than They Shouldn't Give The Damn Award" realm when his team clinched a postseason berth with three games to spare. 20-32 to a playoff spot? In a year where it took every bit of 90 wins to earn a playoff spot (whereas in other seasons, 82 is plenty)? Simply ridiculous. Unfathomable. Jim Tracy is a savior.

The other thing I wanted to tackle is an explanation. I get pretty aggressive when it comes to analyzing national attention given (or not given) to my beloved Rockies, and a little while back, I figured out why. I was coddled with Denver-based media for 18 years, never having to worry about national media. Well, when you go off to college in Wisconsin, and then work in Iowa, all you have to depend on is national media. Sure, I read religiously, but sometimes, it's just not the same. My father and a few close friends do their best to keep me keyed in, but again, it's just not the same. I STILL have not been a Rockies game this year, which is the first time in the existence of the franchise that I did not attend a regular season game at Coors Field or Mile High Stadium. Throw in the fact that I am a sportswriter at heart, and of course, my criticism of ESPN just gets more intense.

So, two things: first, I don't mean to spit on ESPN. It covered the Rockies an appropriate amount, and from working full-time for a newspaper these past four months, it's helped me learn that, well, you don't always necessarily cover the HOT team; you gotta please the highest amount of readers. It sounds awkward and perhaps unfair, but hey, ya can't bring home the bacon if you're not serving your highest readership. Subscriptions and ratings DO matter. So I understand why ESPN does what it does. I'm just spoiled by their strangely-stalkerish love of the Nuggets and Broncos, so sometimes I get a little carried away with how much or little they cover the Rox. And secondly, it may have taken all of four years - or, well, it probably just took my first full summer away from home - I learned that it sucks covering a team from afar. It's absolutely dreadful. I can deal with it for Nuggets season, because they're on TV every other night; and I'm more of an NFL fan than a Bronco fan, so I can deal there too. But it's been very difficult to enjoy the Rockies this year. It makes me sad, but it's the facts of life, and I hope that everyone who currently lives in the city of their favorite team cherishes it, because it's much different watching from afar.

So on that note, I will announce that I have made plans to be back in Denver for games 3 and 4! I have not been in the Mile High City since May, and even then, I was groggy from oral surgery. It's been a long time, so anybody who reads this and is in Denver, hit me up on my cell or the good ol' Facebook if you want to hang out Saturday, Sunday or Monday.

And please, don't Tweet me. That's just lame.

Well, that was longer than I expected. So here's the REAL fun part of the blog post. Let's recap the past three MLB seasons:

2007 - Padres-Rockies, both 89-73, play in Colorado for NL Wild Card. Rockies win 9-8 in 13 innings.
2008 - Twins-White Sox, both 88-74, play in Chicago for AL Central. White Sox win 1-0 on Jim Thome home run.
2009 - Tigers-Twins, both 86-76, play in Minnesota for AL Central. Twins win 6-5 in 12 innings.

Three tiebreaker games in three years. Two go to extra innings. The other was 'first to score wins'. All three decided by one run.

And I guarantee you, whether you're a fan of the Rockies or Tigers or Yankees or Yomiuri Giants or Quad-City River Bandits ... you were watching. And you were tense. And you were EXCITED.

Why not? How seldom do we get ONE game in baseball to decide it all? Would any of us complain if you knew there would be a play-in game in 2010 and 2011 and 2012 and every year after that?

So, to coin an old phrase of mine...HERE'S A THOUGHT. What if we DID have a play-in game every year?

Take a breath. Calm down. Now listen to this ... what if we had TWO OF 'EM?!?!?!

Here's my plan: the division winners make the playoffs as they usually do, and seed 'em 1-2-3. Then you take the two non-division-champion teams with the best records in each league, and they play ONE GAME FOR THE WILD CARD. The winner moves on to play the top seed (divisions don't matter ... so for example, this year, Rockies could play Dodgers in the first round), the loser goes home.

Here are the positives: you extend the regular season longer for more teams, because there's a better chance of playing past 162. You have less teams mailing in the last 10, 15 games of the season. You give home advantage to the wild card team with the better record, and not only that, but if they've wrapped it up a few games in advance (while the weaker wild card is still fighting for a berth in this play-in game), they can set their rotation perfectly for such an event. It gives a great advantage to the overall top seed - something that should be rewarded - because the winner of this play-in game will have presumably lost its best pitcher for the first few games. TBS gets a doubleheader - one AL game, one NL game - and one hell of a promo event for the upcoming playoffs. And most importantly, you get the fans' juices running on overdrive right at the end of the season and beginning of the playoffs. You GRAB THEIR ATTENTION so they are more inclined to watch the rest of the postseason, rather than dismissing it and just sticking with college and pro football.

How could this miss? HOW COULD IT?

I think it's brilliant. Let me know what you think.

And now, playoff picks

AL Divisional Series:
Yankees beat Twins in three. New York is too good and too deep. Minny is a nice story, but this thing will be essentially over before the series shifts back for some Metrodome Magic.
Angels beat Red Sox in five. How do the Angels do it year after year? You figure they've got to figure out Boston sometime.

NL Divisional Series:
Cardinals beat Dodgers in four. Chris Carpenter and Adam Wainwright versus Randy Wolf and Clayton Kershaw. Any questions?
Phillies beat Rockies in five. The Rox must start out with a win Wednesday, because Cliff Lee has been terrible lately. Give Philly a 1-0 lead and veteran Cole Hamels the ball on Thursday, and Colorado risks digging itself a hole it might not dig out of.

Then again, you might have said that about 20-32.


Monday, October 5, 2009

Brett Favre Drinking Game, Vol. 1

This game begins at kickoff, pauses at the end of the first half, resumes at the third quarter kickoff and ends 60 seconds after the final gun. For the good of your souls. And your livers.

Take a drink...

Every time Brett Favre is compared to Aaron Rodgers

Every time Brett Favre is shown in a replay wearing a Packer uniform

Every time Brett Favre is shown in a replay wearing a Packer uniform playing the Vikings (extra drink)

Every time Brett Favre is called "this guy" by Jon Gruden

Every time Brett Favre's family is shown

Every time Brett Favre is shown in a Wrangler commercial (two drinks)

Every time Brett Favre is shown in a Sears commercial (three drinks)

Every time 'Brett Favre' is said in the same sentence with 'National Football League' by Ron Jaworski

Every time Brett Favre looks at a tenured Packer and smiles

Every time Brett Favre shakes hands with Aaron Rodgers or Mike McCarthy (chug)

BONUS: Every time Brett Favre shakes hands with Ted Thompson (consume the house)

You might want to update or write your will first.


Thursday, October 1, 2009

NFL Picks Week 4 (US Weekly Edition!)

I will lead off with just saying... Thank God I was raised in Texas (See AJ's post below).

Well we are starting this new tradition and I lucked out this week and get to turn in my picks even though I am a co-founder of the blog. Without further ado... my week 4 picks with each pick related to a celebrity.

Detroit at Chicago
Congratulations Detroit on getting your first win since 2007!! You wont be getting number two. No way you travel to Chicago and get a win at Soldier Field. I think Detroit could be described kinda like Gwyneth Paltrow... she was pretty good for awhile back in the day (her Shakespeare in Love era) but then we didn't hear from her for awhile and she made some bad movies (see Shallow Hal and Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow). But she made a strong comeback in Iron Man! Now we just have to see if she can stick around as an A-lister once again. She just wont get it done this week (and by her I mean Detroit).

Cincinnati at Cleveland
Its never a good sign if you are changing quarterbacks before the calendar flips to October. This one is one of the easiest picks, I don't care if this is a rivalry game inside the division... the Browns are bad. And check out the 2-1 Bengals, who (no offense AJ) should be 3-0. They are making a Robert Downey Jr.-esque comeback. They are definitely here to stay.

Seattle at Indy
Peyton doesn't lose at home to inferior teams. He just doesn't. Speaking of injured Matt Hasselback. He led his team to a super bowl appearance but it was a down year for the NFC. What has he really done that is so impressive in his career? Kinda like Ashton Kutcher... he is a real popular guy, his show Punked was pretty cool... but have you ever seen him in a movie that was above average? Maybe Butterfly Effect... but Amy Smart pushed that movie over the mediocre mark. Hasselback is always hurt and just doesn't get me excited about their team.

New York Giants at Kansas City
This is a dud of a game. One of the best teams in the league against one of the worst. Just a mismatch from the start. Which reminds me of a movie called "The Holiday." I was flipping through the movie channels and I stopped on this movie when I saw that Kate Winslet and Jack Black were hooking up. Seriously? Now don't get me wrong, I like Jack Black and Kate isn't like a top ten hot celebrity... not even top 20... but come on. Definitely a mismatch.

Baltimore at New England
Is New England favored purely on history and fame? Baltimore has looked like the best team in football... hands down. I like the Ravens in this game. They have played the Patriots tough in the past and they have the young gunslinger who is actually leading a high scoring offense in Baltimore! Who woulda thunk?
By the way, does Belichick really think he can just trade away or let his veterans leave and still win? This reminds me of the announcement of a Ghostbusters 3 with new actors. Like you can replace Bill Murray, Dan Akroyd and Ivan Reitman and have a good sequel... what genius thinks this is gonna work. It won't work for the Patriots either.

Tampa Bay at Washington (-7)
I have mentioned Kansas City and Cleveland as some of the worst teams this year. These two complete the bottom 4 (maybe Oakland in there somewhere). Two terrible teams... ugh I'll take the home team. But hell no I won't be watching this. This might be worse than watching Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez in Gigli.

Tennessee (-3) at Jacksonville
Desperate playoff team from last year playing on the road in a must-win game against a team that can't fill half their stadium (next to zero fan support). All of this means a Titans win. Jacksonville was good for awhile but now nobody likes them. The same could be said for A-lister Nicolas Cage. He made some great movies back in the late 90s: Con-Air, Face-Off, Gone in 60 Seconds, The Rock. But now... its always *Movie anouncer voice* "Nicolas Cage in enter a disaster movie here where Cage is a badass and has some power or ability that makes him valuable... this movie is terrible but people will see it because it's Nicolas Cage!" I hate him... and I think people are more in my boat than people that like him. Same goes for you Jaguars... you suck.Oakland at Houston
Al Davis has ruined a great franchise. Very easy pick here. Al Davis cracks me up with his old age and complete loss of control of his franchise. Its not the identical situation with Clint Eastwood, but he CRACKED ME UP in Gran Torino because he was so old and ridiculous but also so badass.

New York Jets at New Orleans (-7)
How is this spread 7? Should be 3. I'll be taking the Jets solely because this should be a great game and I want a chance at double the points because the Jets are such a big dog. Sanchez is like Jamie Foxx in Any Given Sunday... except he is white and not exactly a very mobile QB. But he has injected some excitement in J-E-T-S JETS JETS JETS land. Just like Beamen did with the Miami Sharks.

Buffalo (-2) at Miami
Cry baby T.O finally gets a win. By the way, has there been a bigger rollercoaster than the Miami Dolphins. 1-15, then 11-5, and then what... probably 4-12? I haven't seen this big of a swing since Britney Spears popularity! Ba-da-Ching.... ok that joke has been so overused but it works... so go with it.

St. Louis at San Francisco
Good teams tend to rebound well, especially against awful teams (thats now 6 REALLY REALLY bad teams). The 49ers will have a nice rebound, but it does not rival the rebound of Justin Timberlake after he broke up with Britney... hitting up Jessica Biel and Scarlett Johanson in a 2-week span... SOLID!

Dallas at Denver
Dallas lost to a top-5 team by a field goal when they lost the turnover battle 4-0. I like my team and I'm sure AJ likes his... but they should have lost to Cinnci and beat... *gulp* Oakland and Kansas City. The Broncos WILL make the playoffs as division winners this year... but they don't beat the Cowboys on Sunday. Denver is the most handsome team in an ugly division. They are the Vince Vaughn of the Swingers group.

San Diego at Pittsburgh
Two teams that everyone thought would be powerhouses this year... that may not make the playoffs. I'll go with the home team here. Meanwhile Ben Rothlisberger is getting his Roman Polanski on. I just don't buy it though... I gotta think this is more of a Kobe Bryant thing. No way she wasn't willing to pounce on "Big" Ben.

Green Bay at Minnesota
I don't think either quarterback performs that well. Two really good defenses. My boy AD will do alright. I just think Farve can pull another moment if he needs to in order to stick it to Packers management. This is a year of destiny. I do feel bad for Rodgers though. I'm not the biggest Farve fan, but he is/was an all-time gunslinger. It's like trying to replace Sean Connery as James Bond... its a lose-lose situation for Rodgers. He is going to be a different type of quarterback and not a small-town down-to-earth (and selfish) guy like Farve. Whether he is Roger Moore or Pierce Brosnan... he is no Sean Connery.

Stay Classy,


TNEA of the Month...sort of

So I had a girl in place for 'The Next Erin Andrews', somebody I saw on television who fit the bill quite nicely. However, I had never heard of her before, and when I went to find pictures online, I couldn't find any. Unfortunately, that's kind of an important aspect to this monthly feature. So, I'll have to keep her in mind, and perhaps get her in for a future honor. Let's just say she's in the volleyball world, and again, she has appeared on television as an analyst.

Now, I owe pictures. Well, how about I do you one better and go with video? But first, a picture. Without further ado...The Dallas Stars Ice Girls.

And now, a video daily double.

Enjoy. (I know B-Dubs will. That Dallas rascal.)

They can grab a microphone and replace EA know, if tragedy struck and they were needed.