Thursday, December 16, 2010

NFL Power Rankings

First off, everyone needs to try this game that AJ put up. I scored a 57 out of 64, see if you can top that.

Second, there are only 3 weeks left in the NFL regular season, which means: A) The bookies definitely know what they are doing now, so just put your wallets away (Did you see how many backdoor covers there were last week?) and B) There is no better time to start my NFL Power Rankings!

So without further ado:

1) New England Patriots: I don't think there is much question that they deserve this spot.
Most of these rankings will be one-liners but Brady deserves some stat love.
Tom Brady has thrown 29 TD's and only 4 INT's. He hasn't thrown an INT since week 6 (but HAS thrown 19 TD's) when he threw two against the Ravens, his Kryptonite. His other two interceptions came at the Jets in week 2. In that game he forced the ball to Randy Moss with TEN targets, and Rex Ryan's defense made him pay for it. They have looked unstoppable in the past few weeks against those same Jets and in a blizzard against a tough Chicago defense. They have home field all but locked up and they look untouchable in Foxboro.

2) New Orleans Saints: Why rank them ahead of Atlanta? New Orleans has survived many injuries to stars this year (Greer, Bush, Thomas). They are only one game back of ATL and they would be ahead of them and in command for home field if it weren't for Garrett Hartley missing a chip shot in their head to head earlier this season. Plus, Matt Ryan looks good but is unproven in January, while Drew Brees looks good and is proven in February. I'll take the Saints.

3) Pittsburgh Steelers: I don't care how bad that O-line is, Big Ben likes to have sex in bathrooms and also happens to be a beast of a QB1. Oh their defense is pretty good too. However, they got stomped on by the Pats in Pitt AND I am worried about the health of Polamalu down the stretch. (There may be a huge gap between NE and the rest of the AFC).

4) Atlanta Falcons: They will be tough to beat with home field, but I don't trust their defense or Matt Ryan until I can see them win a playoff game.

5) Baltimore Ravens: Ray Lewis and Ed Reed scare me, but Joe Flacco doesn't. I still think they have the best shot of knocking off the Pats, their defense always looks good against Tommy.

6) Philadelphia Eagles: Mike Vick and Desean Jackson scare me, but their defense has had some big injuries. Not sure they can play January football, but anything can happen if you put him in a game in Atlanta. THAT would be must see TV.

7) Chicago Bears: This team proved they can't play in the elements and they may have to with a divisional home playoff game. Their defense is good enough for this ranking. Julius Peppers can change a game by himself.

T-8) NY Giants and NY Jets: Both teams are too up and down for me. Jets have been flat as of late and won't have the aide of their strength and conditioning coach for the rest of the season, which concerns me. Giants have too many injuries and I am worried Brandon Jacobs won't be able to find his helmet for the playoff game.

10) Indianapolis Colts: Watch out for Peyton! Just when you counted him out. They are getting a bit healthier. Pierre looks like a WR again. They can make a run in the playoffs iffff......

11) Jacksonville Jaguars: MJD doesn't carry his team to a division title, which he can. I don't think this team can win two games in the playoffs, but they could win one, as long it's not the 2nd place AFC North team. It's funny that this team was desperate for a QB early in the season.

12) Green Bay Packers: Explosive at times, but they probably don't even make the playoffs. They picked the wrong time to lose their Pro Bowl QB and play the Patriots on the road. FlashOpinion: Isn't point differential the worst stat? +117 and might not make the playoffs. Jacksonville has a -36, but they WIN when they have to.

13) San Diego Chargers: Definitely better than Kansas City, with or without Matt Cassel. But too little too late. Antonio Gates where are you!

14) Kansas City Chiefs: See above. As Bill Simmons says, "I can't wait to bet against this team in the playoffs!"

15) St. Louis Rams: SAAAAAMMMMMYYYYYY! I rank them ahead of Tampa Bay because the Rams dominated that game. Damn you Josh Freeman! Sam Bradford has some pretty stellar numbers for a rookie QB.

16) Tampa Bay Bucs: Another team bitten by the injury bug. Another reason they are below the Rams.

17) Houston Texans: How is Gary Kubiak still employed? This team is loaded with talent on offense and the front 7 on defense. Yes their secondary is awful, but with their other strengths they should have more than 5 wins.

18) Oakland Raiders: If Al Davis was alive... I think he would be quite proud of this team.

19) Seattle Seahawks: Awful on the road. Either the Hawks or St. Louis will have a tough time against the wildcard team in the NFC. If Karma exists, then Pete Carroll's team should not make the playoffs.

20) Miami Dolphins: One name: Chad Henne. Run the wildcat every down and you at least have a chance. How does team have a winning record?

21) Dallas Cowboys: Well Jason Garrett has a job for 2011, I just don't know if that makes me happy or furious.

22) Minnesota Vikings: If Adrian Peterson doesn't get 40 carries with some guy named "Webb" at QB, then Brad Childress should be fired! Oh wait.... Fire him again!

23) San Francisco 49ers: Hey San Francisco! I think he has played well enough... yes, that is right, 2011 will be the year of Alex Smith!

24) Washington Redskins: Is there any doubt that McNabb is traded or cut in the offseason?

25) Cleveland Browns: Colt McCoy will eventually lead this team to the playoffs. It may be in 2015, but it will happen eventually. Don't worry Cleveland we still love you, even if Lebron doesn't.

26) Detroit Lions: Talk about bad luck. Will Stafford ever stay healthy? With any semblance of a QB, this team is close to .500. Instead they are the best 3-10 team in a long time.

27) Tennessee Titans: Randy Moss is a cancer (apologies to Charlie Villenueva). Oh and Jeff Fisher... you lost your team awhile ago.

28) Denver Broncos: I want Tebow to start so everyone can see how bad he is (sorry AJ).

29) Buffalo Bills: I'd rank them higher, but they play some games in Canada... so I didn't even remember they qualified for these rankings until now.

30) Arizona Cardinals: It is a bad omen when your QB's name closely resembles something associated with death.

31) Cincinnati Bengals: I just ran back a Carson Palmer interception for six. Can we nickname him "King TAINT?"

32) Carolina Panthers: If the Victoria Secret Angels were dancing in the Panthers End Zone I might watch this team play. Oh wait, they don't score, so I wouldn't even see the Angels. So ya, you couldn't pay me to watch this team. Just over one offensive TD a game.... beyond bad.

That's all for now. Stay Classy,


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