Case of the Mondays, Part I (Quick Hits)

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Didn't have time last week - too busy with work - for a Riverside Rants, so we'll try something new tonight. Just some quick-hit, one- or two-line thoughts on the past two weeks of sports.

So here we go, Riverside Rants for a Monday that feels kinda weird without checking my fantasy baseball team even once...

• Roger Federer: Greatest of All-Time. If you win the most big events, you're the best ever. End of discussion.


• It's simply remarkable that Andy Roddick became the player we never thought he could be, at this seasoned age and with a pretty hot wife in his life. Hopefully, those two weeks weren't just a flash in the pan; because if he truly is this skilled overall now, then he will absolutely win a second major before his time is done. Write it down.


• This just in - Albert Pujols is good.


• And while we're right to at least be suspicious - it sucks, Albert, but that's life - he has a right to complain about our suspicions. After all, his test-of-time consistent stats indicate he's clean. Sure hope he is.


• I'm still unsure about baseball's decision - OK, Bud Selig's decision - to have the All-Star Game count for that much. On the one hand, it makes me watch. On the other hand, it takes a fun event and makes it stressful, since any fan with a contending team in the losing league gets pissed afterward.


• So here's my suggestion to make it even wackier: make it I survived a Japanese Game Show! style. Whichever league wins the Home Run Derby, gets "big advantage in second game!" aka ASG. So now the National League should, like, get four outs in the first and ninth innings or something like that. And then the HRD gets even larger ratings. Done and done.


• Hey, did you hear Michael Jackson died?


• From this week's "I'm not tootin' my own horn, I'm just...well...okay, I'm tootin' my own horn" department: I said in March that C.C. Sabathia would go 14-10 with an ERA in the high 3s. At the All-Star break, C.C. (which stands for cold cash, by the way) is 8-6 with a 3.86 ERA. That's on pace, for, uh, about 14-10 with an ERA in the high 3s.


• Excuse me while I give myself a high five.


• Good for Jonathan Sanchez showing everybody he's a better pitcher than, for some reason, the national pundits give him credit for - he is definitely deserving of a place in that awesome Giants rotation. But I won't congratulate him on a no-hit performance, because I'm still waiting for him to throw strike three on the last batter. That pitch was absolutely a ball, and PTI made a great point by discussing how the umpire got a little too excited to punch out the Padres' Everth Cabrera.


• Fantasy Football. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. Just typing those words, well, in the words of Brian Fantana, "I'm very aroused."


• Chauncey Billups. Roy Halladay? Please? Just send Garrett Atkins, Seth Smith and a minor-league arm the Jays' way, and maybe Roy will come home and deliver another WS trip. Please?


• I think I died laughing when I saw the video of Willie Harris taking a bad hop to his, uh, man area. You gotta love the Nats for their comic relief. Wish I had a link to this.


• Why is this Lance Armstrong-Alberto Conquistador (or whatever his name is) thing such a big deal? I was under the impression cycling was an INDIVIDUAL SPORT. Instead of debating who should let who win, how about you BOTH work your butts off 'til the final stage, and then may the best man win? Gee, I thought that's what sports was about. Not being polite. And you wonder why competitive cycling is stupid, Lance or no Lance.


• Speaking of overblown, overaged egos...go away, Brett. Please, go away.


• Wipeout = really funny show. I Survived a Japanese Game Show! = strangely addicting. The Superstars = laaaaaaaaaame.


• Zach Johnson needs a fashion advisor, and quick. And that's all I gotta say about that.

Have a good one.

-AJ